"No, no, no." Louis said, and there was undisguised and obvious frustration in his voice, "The Imperial pet has been kept in luxury for decades, and that includes... ah, a harem."
"Turtle harem." spat Hodgekins, like a curse, "Ludicrous. A ridiculous thing."
The big man shrugged, clearly not interested in arguing the point. "Nevertheless. And so it produces eggs. Dozens of them a year. And twenty years ago, it was a symbol of incredible wealth and status to acquire one."
"But the damn beasts live forever. Ten years after the first wave, everyone who could have wanted one had one, and the sort of people who follow trends from ten years ago could finally afford them. Every upjumped cobbler with enough money and a big enough house bought an egg, and suddenly the country was riddled with turtles. They don't do anything interesting, they make the most ungrateful pets, they eat their weight in vegetables every week. You can't kill them, you can't abandon them, and they'll still be around burdening your grandchildren when you've kicked the bucket."
From the color in the two servants' tones, Aurin could tell that this was a genuine complaint, of the kind which had simmered for years. Presumably someone in the Allstead house had been one of those idiots ten years too late to fashion, and their purchase had cursed the household with an immortal reptilian burden.
Unfortunately, it looked like they were now trying to turn that into Aurin's burden.
"Well." said Louis, awkwardly, after the echoes of Hodgekins' angry rant had faded in the trainyard, "The fact of the matter is that we cannot send off the company's money and keep the tortoise here. The OIR is bad enough; I trust none of us wants the Inquisition to come knocking at our doors, yes?."
That had been Valentin Valentin's nightmare, too, although probably not for tortoise-related reasons. The revenue service might imprison or even kill those who tried to shield money from the grasping hand of Empire, certainly. The Inquisition was only too happy to use runes and torture both to draw the names of conspirators from its victims. Their involvement was the only realistic way that things really went south for Darus of Haqs.
"Mmm. Anyway, thirty-five. It's not as though we're asking you to keep the tortoise, Darus. And let's not exaggerate here, the Imperium hasn't exactly got the time and resources to spend harassing Haqs over some railway owner's tax disputes. As for Zaichaer... to be frank I don't know what is going on over there. I heard rumors that they started flying the buildings around, is that true, do you suppose? Either way, you've got all of Atinaw between you and the OIR, and I assure you that Mr. Valentin isn't going to risk his sorry hide with that pack of savages."

